Just Need Your Advice

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This topic contains 16 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Lola43 1 week, 2 days ago.

Viewing 15 posts - 1 through 15 (of 17 total)
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  • #4261

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    Hi, everybody! I decided to write here because I need your help. I am 36 years old and I have diabetes of the first type. 11 years ago I gave birth to a lovely son. The pregnancy lasted ok, because I managed to balance my glucose level. Several years ago I married another man, and now we are dreaming of giving birth to our mutual child. However, my health became worse. I can’t balance my glucose level for nearly 2 years. In addition, I have some kidney problems caused by diabetes. My GP advises me not become pregnant, as my kidneys don’t work properly. She advises us to find a surrogate mother… We’re the UK residents, and surrogacy is allowed here. However, we don’t have a relative or a close friend to carry a child for us. We’re a little bit afraid to contact anyone from the outside, so we’ve decided to go to Ukraine, where surrogacy is available and well-regulated by the law. We contacted several Ukrainian clinics in Kiev, and here are my feedbacks about them. The first clinic is Botexcom. We’ve chosen it because we’ve found loads of favorable feedbacks about it in the internet. We contacted it via e-mail, and in several weeks we came to Kiev. The clinic turned to be extremely tiny. It looked like a small private villa. When we entered the clinic, it was extremely overcrowded. There wasn’t enough place even to stand. Some people were sitting on the stairs. The staff worked very slowly. Especially, we disliked the administrator at the reception desk. She was extremely unfriendly and answered to all our questions unwillingly. There were also large queues near the doctor’s offices. We had to spend nearly 2 hours in the queue before the doctor was ready to meet us. We liked the doctor and the profiles of surrogate mother candidates that the clinic representatives had chosen for us. All of them were young women with children. Their medical tests were excellent… However, we didn’t like the fact that the clinic was so overcrowded and can’t organize its work properly. While standing in the queue we met a couple from Germany. The husband told us that they had to come to the clinic several times to pick up his sperm because of the large queues, and it irritated him greatly. There was also another clinic that we visited. It was Nadia. The things were different there: calm and empty halls, friendly administrator and soothing doctor…. We decided not to sign up a contract with any of these clinics and went home. Now we’re thinking whether to choose one of these clinics or try another one… What do you think about these clinics???

    #4262

    Lily P
    Keymaster

    I think surrogacy is the best option for you.

    #4264

    Spacewoman
    Participant

    Hi, I think you should choose the way they are going to find a surrogate for you. For me, it’s a key moment in choosing the clinic. The surrogate should a healthy woman. She must be psychologically ready to carry and give birth to a child who won’t be hers. In addition, you should check the way the clinic is going to treat the surrogate. She must get all necessary things like medications to feel comfortable during her pregnancy. You may check these things and then make your final decision.

    #4268

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    We’re going to sign up a contract with the clinic. According to this contract, the clinic will find a woman who is healthy enough to become pregnant, carry and give birth to a child. The clinic’s representatives take all responsibilities for supplying a surrogate with all necessary things during her pregnancy. For instance, she’ll get monthly some money to pay her living expenses. In addition, she will have to visit the clinic for a medical checkup. The clinic will pay all medical expenses. For instance, in case of premature delivery, all expenses will be paid by the clinic. The clinic will provide a surrogate with medical insurance. She will get a decent money compensation for being a surrogate. In case, of miscarriage or abortion after the 12th week of pregnancy, she will also be paid a money compensation. This is how a surrogate will be treated. What do you think about it?

    #4269

    Forest Fairy
    Participant

    Hi! I strongly recommend you to consult an attorney before going overseas and finding a surrogate there. It should be done because surrogacy is banned in many countries. You may even break the law by being involved in a surrogacy program. You must be totally sure that you’ll be able to leave Ukraine and enter your country with a baby. If I were you, I would firstly find out this fact and then choose the clinic. Good luck in your surrogacy journey!

    #4272

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    Forest Fairy, thanks for the clue. Before visiting the clinic for the first time, we consulted the attorney. He told us that surrogacy is allowed by the Ukrainian laws. The names of the intended parents are included in the Birth Certificate of the child. It means will get a Birth Certificate where our names will be included. We plan to use this document to leave Ukraine and enter the USA. The clinic’s representatives will translate it for us and assist us in getting a pass for our baby.

    #4277

    Forest Fairy
    Participant

    Ukrainian laws seem to be really loyal for surrogacy. In some countries surrogacy is banned. In others, a surrogate is considered to be a true mom of the baby. She has to reject her rights for the baby. In Ukraine the things are quite different, and it’s really great in some way. However, I think you should choose the clinic that would find a responsible surro mum. Loads of things will depend on her lifestyle. I know that it will be quite difficult to check this fact, but you should certainly discuss this issue with the clinic’s representatives.

    #4282

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    According to the contract we’re to sign up the clinic’s representatives are responsible for finding both physically and mentally healthy woman who agrees to be fertilized, carry and give birth to the baby for the intended parents. This woman has to pass through a rigorous medical checkup. She’ll be also tested psychologically. If she matches all the requirements, she’ll be accepted as a surro mom. The clinic’s representatives will be also responsible for supplying a surrogate with all necessary things during her pregnancy. A surro mum will get a certain sum of money monthly to pay for her living expenses. She also has to visit the clinic monthly for a medical check. The clinic will provide a surrogate with medical insurance. In case of abortion or miscarriage after the 12th week of pregnancy, the surrogate will provided with a decent monetary compensation, and the intended parents will be given another attempt without any additional fees.

    #4283

    Spacewoman
    Participant

    All these things sound really great, hun! As far as I understood, you’re going to deal with the clinic that is situated in Ukraine. It’s a poor country. In addition, it’s at war now. Aren’t you afraid to go there?
    P.S. My close friend was in Ukraine several years ago. He told me that not all Ukrainian can speak and understand English. You may need to hire an interpreter if you go there.

    #4286

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    Ukraine does have certain problems, but the situation isn’t as bad as you think. We visited Kiev, the capital city of Ukraine as our clinic is situated there. The city turned to be very peaceful and cheap one. We didn’t have to look for an apartment because the clinic’s representatives supplied us with a comfortable apartment not far from the city center. They even provided us with free meals and transportation services. Every time when we needed to visit the clinic, they sent a drive to give us a lift. It was really very handy. Our program coordinator was our interpreter. She helped us to communicate with the fertility specialist when we came to the clinic to consult him. When we had free time, they organized a short around the city for us. These are the things we really liked about the clinic.

    #4310

    Forest Fairy
    Participant

    Sounds not bad! However, does the clinic charge any additional fees for its services. As far as I know, some clinics do this. For instance, they may ask you to do some additional health tests or book some optional services. Does Biotexcom do the same?
    P.S. For me, it’s a big con when the clinic charges additional fees. What about you, SquirrelLady?

    #4313

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    I don’t think they would charge any additional fees. At least, I hope they won’t do this. We have to sign up a contract with the clinic. According to this contract, the clinic will charge a fixed sum. This sum will be divided into several installments. We may make the payments either in cash or via a bank transfer. For us, it’s really very handy. We won’t have to pay any money to a surrogate.

    #4315

    Forest Fairy
    Participant

    I quite like the way this clinic charges fees for its services. At least, you may be able to plan your expenses. For me, it’s a great option. Once you’ve decided to deal with this clinic, I would advise you to prepare your visit very carefully. For instance, I would find a good pediatrician in Kiev. It’s better if he checks a baby daily to see that everything is ok. Newly born kids are like small angels. They need loads of care during their first days.

    #4316

    SquirrelLady
    Participant

    I quite understand what you mean, dear. The thing is the clinic is ready to provide us with the services of the qualified doctor. When we take our kid from the maternity house, the baby will be checked by the attending pediatrician daily. In addition, the clinic will provide us with the attending babysitter. She will also come daily and look for our baby for nearly 4 hours. I think, it’s really very handy. If we have any problems with the baby, we’ll be able to phone 24/7 hot line and consult an English speaking pediatrician. In emergency cases, he may visit our apartment.

    #4322

    Forest Fairy
    Participant

    Hi, SquirrelLady! So what’s the news, dear? Did you deal with that clinic or not? I’ve reread all your posts. The clinic really seems to be ok. I’ve visited their official website. They really offer surrogacy for very reasonable prices…

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